This Week's Light Service Sermon

Light Service Sermons for the Month
Family
How to Nurture Faith in Your Children
DATE: May 14, 2000
TEXT: Mark 4:26-29

I've been a parent now for almost 27 years and my experience tells me that Grandma is absolutely right--parenting is like a roller coaster ride--filled with ups and downs, sheer excitement and absolute panic.
One moment your two-year old daughter sits quietly in your lap, snuggling up to you and for a brief moment in time the world comes to a wonderful, screeching halt. The next moment she's on the floor throwing a temper tantrum because she can't find her blank-blank.
One moment your 10-year old son is telling you how great you are. The next minute he screams his hatred of you and locks himself in his room for an hour.
One minute your teenage daughter is hanging on every word you say as you help her with her paper on the mood of the country during the Vietnam War. The next minute she thinks you're a complete idiot, that you know nothing about real life, that you're out of touch. Thirty minutes later she comes to you with that innocent, sweet face telling you how much she loves you and can she please have $20.00 so she can go out with her friends. And of course you can't resist because she's the best thing that's ever happened in your life.
One minute your adult son is asking you the most profound questions about the meaning of life, death and God and the next he tells you that he is really getting more out of meditation and Buddha than he ever did out of listening to one of your sermons. Then he turns around and surprises you by raiding your library of books on Jesus, his life and teachings.
Parenting is like a roller coaster. And only the thrill seekers survive it. Thankfully, most of us do. And when all is said and done, after all of the ups and downs, the stress and worry, the joys and celebrations, most of us can say that the ride was well worth the price of the ticket.
As many of you know, Linda and I are in a very interesting place in our parenting career. Both our children are grown and fairly independent. Skip is living and working in Chicago and Stacy is living and going to graduate school in Berkeley. Both are self-sufficient and living in other communities. Our roller coaster ride is now taking us on new turns. We aren't able to talk and listen to them everyday. We aren't able to protect them and watch over then like we used to. As parents, we are now in that exciting, frightening phase of letting our children go, trusting them to be on their own.
The Bible reading for today is taking on a new meaning for me. It says very simply, "Teach your children right from wrong, and when they are grown, they will still do right."
When all is said and done, all of us parents must eventually leave our children in the care of God. Eventually all of them have to get into their own roller coaster car and trust that the faith and values we've nurtured in them have taken root and will now grow.
And that's why the most important thing we can do in the lives of our children is nurture faith in them. For ultimately it is the faith and values that we instill in them that will shape their life choices and help them to be the people God created them to be.
So we're going to spend a few moments today talking about how to nurture faith in our children during the roller coaster ride of parenting, but before we do, let's pray together.
O son of God, you were once a child in this world, and your mother, Mary, marveled at your greatness. Now we thank you this day for the blessings of our own children. This morning may we share in the sheer joy of their lives. And may we join them in their sense of true wonder as they experience more and more of life. AMEN
Every once in a while I'll be talking with a parent about their children and the subject will turn to faith and religion. And sometimes I'll hear a parent say, "I'm going to let my children decide for themselves whether or not they'll make faith a part of their life. So I'm not going to bring them to church until they ask me to. You see, I have no right to force my faith or values on my kids."
The truth is, however, that whatever approach we take to faith in the lives of our kids plants a certain kind of seed in them. If we take them to church and nurture faith in them we plant seeds of faith in them. If we don't actively attend to faith and value issues, we plant seeds of disinterest. And besides that, who besides parents should be responsible for the faith and value development of their children?
Our Bible reading for today is absolutely correct. What we sow in our kids now is reaped later when they're adults. So as a parent I want to make sure I'm planting positive, life-transforming faith seeds now so that they'll grow when my kids are on their own. I know you feel that way, too. That's why you're here.
So let me share a few thoughts on how to plant the kind of seeds that will yield a harvest of faith in your children as they grow into adulthood.
1) The first key for nurturing faith in our children is to model it--to be an example of a faith-filled person.
Mom was trying to teach her daughter what a Christian should be like. After listening patiently the little girls asked, "Mom, have I ever met one of these Christians?"
A young boy lost his temper and let loose a string of less than honorable words. His mother was shocked and said, "Young man, where did you learn to talk that way?"
He turned to his dad and said, "Well, dad, should I tell her?"
Faith, most of the time, is caught rather than taught. Our children watch us carefully. And what they learn about life and faith is most often discovered from what they observe us doing. Faith is nurtured in our children when they see consistency between what we say and what we do. When we apologize for not always being consistent and when they see that we live in a spirit of forgiveness, that we live in the confidence that God accepts and forgives us even when we blow it, when He gives us the joy to start again, our example speaks volumes.
David Hume, the 18th century philosopher and skeptic was kidded by his friends because he went to church every week to hear a certain pastor preach. To their kidding he said, "I don't believe everything he said, but he lives everything he believes. And once a week I like to hear a man who believes what he says."
We nurture faith in our children when we live and practice what we believe. Obviously, to be an example of faith means that we are people of faith, people whose lives have been changed by the unconditional love of Jesus Christ, whose life-perspective is shaped by him and his values. And as Jesus lives in us he empowers us to live a life that models faith for our children.
2) Secondly, along with that, we nurture faith in our children when we create a faith-filled atmosphere in the home, an environment where faith is a normal, everyday part of life. That climate is set in several ways.
For example, when I was a kid my mom used to have prayer with us every night before we went to bed. It reminded me that Jesus would take care of me every day.
At dinnertime, we would always say a prayer. And there were times when my kids would catch up dad when he plunged ahead on a turkey drumstick.
I heard about one mom who read stories from the Bible to her children. She would read a few traditional fairy tales to them, like the story of the Three Little Pigs, and then they would look at some of the great stories of the Bible.
One night she read a verse from the Bible how Jesus stands at the door of our hearts knocking. After reading the verse she asked her son, "If Jesus is knocking on the door of your heart, will you open the door and let him in?" To which her son replied, "Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin."
In our family we also talked openly and freely about faith, sharing our ideas, asking questions, because for us faith is an important aspect of our lives. Even in those times when my behaviors are anything but Christian or pastoral, I talk about how Christians aren't perfect people--but people who love Jesus, make mistakes, and start again because Jesus gives us a fresh start. We want to create an environment where Jesus is an everyday part of life.
A little girl was afraid of the dark. One night her mother told her to go out to the back porch and bring in the broom. The little girl said, "Please, mommy, don't make me go out there. I'm afraid of the dark." Mom smiled and said, "You don't have to be afraid of the dark, honey. Jesus is out there. He'll take care of you."
The little girl asked, "Are you sure he's out there?"
"Yes, honey, I'm sure he's out there. He's everywhere, and he's always ready to help you when you need him."
So the little girl bravely headed toward the dark porch. She cracked open the door just a little, peered out into the darkness and called, "Jesus? If you're out there, would you please hand me that broom?"
That kid has been nurtured in a home where faith is woven in the fabric of family life. Jesus is just as much a part of the family culture as TV, school, work, and dinner.
3) Third, we nurture faith in our children by worshipping with them regularly. I know with the Explorers' Club meeting at the same time as the Light Service that is not routinely possible. But remember we do have two other opportunities on a Sunday morning to worship with our children.
When we worship together as a family we give our children a foundation that nourishes their spirits and fills them with the sense of God's love for them. Their spirit will be fed and nourished by something whether it's TV, video games, the advice of peers, and so on, and nourishing them on the love of God week after week fills our children with a positive, life-transforming gift.
A large skyscraper had developed a crack in the wall on the 42nd floor. The manager of the company that owned the building called an architect and asked him to come and investigate the problem.
When the architect arrived the manager took the elevator to the 42nd floor to meet him. But the architect was no where to be found. Eventually the manager found him in the sixth basement. He chewed out the architect demanding to know why he was in the basement when the crack was on the 42nd floor. The architect replied, "Sir, the crack may be on the 42nd floor but the problem is here."
When he discovered was that during the building of the foundation of the skyscraper a former security guard had been stealing bricks out of the wall. And after six years the foundation was beginning to sag, causing the crack on the 42nd floor.
Nurturing faith in our children give us the chance, and them, to build the right foundation, so that 6, 12, 15, 30 years from now their lives will be stable, secure, purposeful, and filled with all that God has for them.
I encourage you as parents to make the faith of your children a high priority by inviting Jesus to shape your heart and life that you might model faith, that you might build a faith environment, and that you make worship a lifestyle. And as the seeds of faith are planted and nourished, God will cause them to grow and give life to your children.
AMEN