This Week's Sermons

Sermons for the Month
Giving Your Heart a Break
DATE: July 19, 1998
SERVICE: Pentecost VII
TEXT: Proverbs 17:22; Matthew 12:20
"To all of you Saints here this morning, grace and peace to you from God our Father, from His Son, Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit. AMEN

A woman was getting tired of her husband's constant complaining about his health. So finally one day she took him to the doctor. The doctor thoroughly examined him and then pulled the woman aside privately and said, "Ma'am, your husband does have a heart condition. But if you will take this menu of items, buy them, then five times a day prepare a special meal for him, he might live. If you don't, chances are he will die."
On the way home in the car that day, the husband was still complaining much to her exasperation. After ranting on and on for a half hour, he finally asked his wife, "What did the doctor tell you?" She looked straight at him and then said, "The doctor says you're going to die!"

Of course, we're all going to die someday. But in the meantime, we hope we can build and maintain a healthy life and healthy heart as long as we can.

The last few weeks we have been focusing on the theme "Building a Healthy Heart." We've taken it beyond our physical heart to talk about the center of our being. The Bible describes the heart as the center of our thoughts, our emotions, our will. Just as we need to stay healthy by eating right, exercising and getting plenty of rest, so also in our spiritual life. We've talked about ways that we can exercise, and ways that we can receive nutrition.

Today, we're going to talk about how we can enjoy rest, how we can give our hearts a break.

Once upon a time, I found myself racing through the airport to catch a plane. I always get a little anxious before leaving on a trip but this time was different. The plane was late arriving in Chicago with the result that I had only 15 minutes to catch the next plane to Cleveland. I arrive at the gate panting carrying my "carry on," my ever present camera bag and a couple of souvenirs. My heart was pounding. I had been going too fast with too much.

How do we keep our heart healthy if we're going too fast with too much? When our load gets too heavy, how do we give our heart a break?

I have a burlap sack here. It is an itchy, scratchy burlap sack. Would you believe me if I suggested that all of us have such a sack? An itchy, scratchy burlap sack? You don't remember receiving it. You may not even know you have it. But it is yours. You have this itchy, scratch burlap sack, because you need it to put all the stones that you've been collecting over the years. Huge stones, boulders, pebbles, rocks, all shapes and sizes, all unwanted. You didn't ask for them. You didn't seek them. They were given to you.

Stones like this one…this stone is called "rejection."

You received this stone when you failed at that tryout. It wasn't for lack of intent or for lack of hard work. Heaven knows how hard you tried to make the team. You thought you were good enough for the team, but the coach didn't. Your instructor didn't. You believed in yourself but others didn't. So they gave you this stone called rejection. They gave it to you and many others as well. You don't have to grow very old before you start collecting stones like this. You make a bad grade. You make a mistake. You get called a few names. You get abused. You get mocked. You start accumulating stones like this. And it doesn't stop when you are an adult. Have you ever received a stone like this from a family member? From a child? From a parent? From a spouse? Or an ex-spouse? I know a man whose been job hunting for over three years! Talk a about a stone of rejection.

So, we accumulate these stones of rejection. These heavy stones. These unwanted stones. And our sack gets heavy. We accumulate these stones we don't deserve along with a few stones that we do deserve.

Here's a stone that we could call "regrets." Regret for the time you lost your temper. Regret for that day you lost control. Regret for those years that you lost your priorities. Regrets for saying what you thought was the truth but it turned about to be falsehood. We add these stones to our sack. More and more, guilty stones, called regret. Something you've done. Something you wish you hadn't done or something you wish you had. We add this to our sack and the load gets even heavier.

Along with that we find another stone to add. A stone called "responsibility." Of course, we all need to be responsible. But I'm talking about ultra-responsibility. This stone begins to get round and look like the world, the globe, and it begins to feel like you're carrying it on your shoulders. This stone feels so heavy because you feel like you are responsible for your family's success. For the success of your child. For the success of your company. Or you feel totally responsibility for the success of your own life. This stone gets very heavy. You add it to the pile. You throw it into your sack. And the sack gets heavier and heavier.

No wonder we see so many sad faces! We see so many people dragging their feet. No wonder we see so many sagging shoulders. This sack gets very, very heavy. What do we do? How do we find relief?

We try different places. We take this sack to work. We resolve that we will relieve this stress by working so hard we will forget about this sack. We leave the sack at the door and we arrive early and work hard and we leave late. People are impressed. But at the end of the day as we leave, the sack is still there. We must take it home with us. It's still heavy.

Some may take it to the bar. The "happy hour." With a name like that there must be some relief, right? We set it beside the stool and sit down. We have a few drinks. We feel a little better. But after a few drinks, the music gets so loud our head gets light and we look down and there is the sack. It's still there.

We may take this sack to our therapist. We sit on the couch and we spill these stones on the floor. We name them one by one. The counselor listens. She empathizes. She gives us some helpful advise. But when it's time to go home, we still have to take this sack, gather these rocks and take them home with us.

Some of us bring this sack to church. Somehow we hope that religion will help us empty our sack. But somewhere along the way some well-meaning yet misguided teacher or preacher or fellow church member instead of taking stones out of our sack has added stones to it. As hard as you try to listen and do what is right, this messenger, instead adds more burdens to your life. More responsibility. More pressure. More guilt. More regrets. And along the way instead of lightening the load, it has gotten heavier.

There is nothing more you want than relief from this heavy load. Unfortunately, one of the tragedies of this stone story is that as we carry this load we tend to throw stones at those we love most.

There is an old saying, "When you are at war with yourself, you are at war with others." If you feel good about yourself, you can affirm others. Almost every time I have been personally attacked by someone over the years, I find my attacker to be someone who is affirmation-starved. It's hard to forgive when you feel so guilty yourself.

The Apostle Paul understood this principle and in Ephesians 5:28, he talks about the relationship between wives and husbands—but it's true of all relationships. He says, "Husbands love your wives as yourself."

As we can affirm and accept and know that we are forgiven ourselves, we can love others. But the opposite is also true. If you feel ashamed, if you feel guilty, if you feel embarrassed, it is then awfully hard to reach out to another person. And so we throw some of the stones at those we love.

So the cycle continues—this hurt, this pain, this rejection, this regret, until, hopefully, it is broken. Which leads to the questions, "How do we break this cycle? How do we find rest? How do we get relief? How do we give our heart a break?"

This leads me to one of the most wonderful, kind passages in the whole Bible. Jesus says, "Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my load is light." Rest.

You might be thinking, "Well Stan, I've heard that before. I've tried. I come to church. I sit in the pew. I read the Bible yet I don't feel relief from this rejection and regret—this heavy load I'm carrying. I don't feel at rest!"

If that is you, I would like to ask you a very delicate but deliberate question. Is it possible that you've been looking for rest in the wrong place? Have you been looking for rest in religion and missed God? Have you been looking for rest in the church and missed seeing Christ? Clearly, Jesus says in this passage, "Come to me." Not "Come to Pastor Stan" or come to another person or to a building. But "come to me." Come to Jesus.

Oh, we can very easily end up in the wrong places. If I can tell one on John Maroni, our Youth Director. A couple of weeks ago he went across the street to the post office to have a letter weighed and buy some stamps. He got in line behind the people waiting at the counter. When it was his turn, he asked if he could have his letter weighed. The clerk replied, "I'm sorry but you must be looking for the post office. This is the AAA office."

And so Jesus says, "Come to me." In fact he goes a step further and says, "I come to you." Jesus came to a woman who was carrying a huge, heavy sack. And itchy, scratchy burlap sack full of stones. He met her at the well—the drinking fountain if you will. She'd been married five times and divorced. And the man she was now living with, she wasn't married to. In those days, women couldn't get a divorce. Only the men could. Can you imagine the feelings of rejection? Can you imagine the pain? Can you imagine the regret she felt?

Jesus knew all that. He told her so. He could have crushed her. He could have taken that pain and pushed it further. Pushed her away from God. Pushed her away from help. But Jesus knew one thing. He wanted to give her rest. That is why in our text today, Jesus speaks of himself when he says, "A bruised reed he will not break. A faint wick he will not blow out." No, this Jesus instead wants to come and bring hope and healing. He spoke words of love and acceptance to this woman.

Then one by one, piece by piece, she pulled these rocks out of the sack. And He took them.

She was so delighted. She ran into town and told everyone in the community—this place where she belt so embarrassed and so estranged. This culture that condemned divorce. This culture that condemned people living together out of marriage. She felt so free now that she could tell them about this Jesus that she had met.

This same Jesus is here today to take your load. To lift it off your shoulder. Friend, come to Jesus. Come and meet him. Come and spill your rocks. Come and share with this Jesus the secrets of your soul. He knows them already. He can lift your burden.

Maybe today you feel those tinges of rejection from someone in your past or someone in your present. Maybe you feel those regrets. It is hard to dream about the future when you're carrying such a load from the past. But Jesus comes today to set you free.

I'd like to ask you before we end our time together by asking you to close your eyes and imagine with me that Jesus is right here with you. Place your hands out in front of you. Make a fist to symbolize a stone that's holding you back. Name your stone whether rejection, regret, guilt, or whatever. Take a moment to give that stone to God. Now open your hand and let Jesus take the stone. Pray in your heart, "Jesus, I need you to take this burden. I can't bear it. I give it to you.

AMEN